You are not too much for me.
If you feel everything at full volume, if you've been dropped, dismissed, or told to just breathe, this page is for you.
I work openly and gladly with borderline personality and intense emotion. Most therapists won't say that. I will, because this work is a genuine passion of mine, not a burden I tolerate.
If this is familiar, keep reading
People who feel things at full volume have often collected a long history of being handled rather than understood.
You may recognise some of this.
You feel like people around you do not grasp how hard it actually is, and explaining it has started to feel pointless.
You have been told to just breathe, or just regulate, by someone who has never felt what you feel.
A therapist has ended things with you before, and you concluded that you were too much to work with.
You went through DBT and came out the other side feeling like you failed it, rather than that it failed to fit you.
You were asked to leave a program, and that confirmed the worst thing you already believed about yourself.
You doubt anything will help this time. And you are here reading this anyway.
None of that means you are too much. It means the fit was wrong, and fit is something we can actually talk about.
Like your skin is on fire, everything around you feels dangerous, and you're just hoping someone will help put the fire out.
That's how I've come to understand what borderline personality can feel like from the inside: an unbearably painful way of experiencing the world, while desperately hoping someone will finally get it and not be scared away.
I don't see BPD as manipulation. I see people internally screaming for their needs to be met, testing whether the person in front of them will stay. And I firmly believe, because I've seen it, that BPD is recoverable. I consider it a privilege to sit with people the field has too often misunderstood, and what I experience in that room isn't “a lot.” It's really deep, meaningful connection.
Real validation is rarer in mental health care than it should be. Being understood, without someone rushing to fix or soften you, changes what is possible in a room.
Deep, unrushed, and impossible to fail.
DBT woven in, not delivered at you
I weave DBT skills informally through the work, alongside EFT and IFS. No workbook marched through chapter by chapter, no group you can get kicked out of. The skills arrive when they're useful, inside a real relationship with a real person.
Ruptures are information, not failures
If something goes sideways between us, we unpack it together, in real time, with someone who will keep showing up for you. That repair is often the most healing part of the whole thing.
Testing is welcome
Some people need to test whether I'm safe before they trust me. That makes complete sense to me, and I don't rattle. I can sit with shame, defensiveness, and intensity without needing to shut any of it down quickly.
Validation first, always
I think real validation is rarer than it should be in mental health care. Clients have told me that after a session they finally felt like they could breathe, because someone actually understood.
One honest note: I work virtually and I am not a crisis service. I'm comfortable working alongside intense struggles, and when things are urgent we'll make sure you also have crisis supports in place near you. In Canada, you can call or text 9-8-8 any time, day or night.
Come test whether I'm safe. I can take it.
Twenty minutes, free, by video. Bring the doubt, bring the “nothing has helped before.” I've heard it, I understand why you feel it, and I'd still like to meet you.
Book your free 20-minute consult